Closures are essential for life. It is essential to move forward. In Hindu practices, an equivalent is Prayaschittha (praa-yes-chi-tha), ritualistic offering to make amends. Both mean you make remedy for problem and try to move on. Simple, isn’t it?
Closures in an of themselves need not be complex and need not always end in success. Closures need not be just for complex problems alone. For e.g., when I was young and in High School, I loved playing Cricket. I was a good fast bowler and many times I considered myself invincible when I was in the ‘zone’. While I didn’t pursue Cricket in my adult life, I recently got back to playing cricket about 3 years ago. The first few days I bowled at the two teams I played, I was pretty impressive. Until some good or great batsman came along and figured out how to handle my bowling. He whacked me all over the field; granted I wasn’t in the zone. But it left me a message in my inner conscience that there was no invincibility anywhere. I didn’t feel defeated or depressed, but I learnt that bowling isn’t my forte any more. Thus I don’t have to go back to the field trying to prove anything, anymore. Yes, I had given up, but I had made peace just with that simple notion within myself. This helped me release myself.
Same thing applies to other situation. You have to reach a point where you reconcile with your conscience that it is over. Yes, I don’t propose solutions to your problems. What I am saying is you need to get to that state, whenever you are in a situation, that you need to move on. Once you make that determination, the solution will present itself. Another example, in the many years after I started driving, I was not the most calm driver. I would get upset if someone bore on me (tailgated me) or didn’t follow the rules. It wasn’t uncommon for me to curse or even show the finger (yes, I have done that :)). The end result – it was I who felt bad about losing my cool. So how did I reconcile? I made amends for such acts almost immediately after. I would let someone in a hurry pass me. Now, I felt good about myself. My conscience felt light and I could sense the bird of happiness afloat in my heart. Not all resolution would be such simple, but the key is to find a resolution. Compromise can be a big part of a resolution. What is involved is for you to figure out – for you are in a unique situation that no one is in. Prayaschittha need not be ritualistic, but if it helps to clear your conscience, you should go for it.
In Yoga, the Swadishtaana Chakra or the second chakra, is a place where all the results of past actions are considered stored. This Chakra is about four finger widths below the navel. You want to sit in a meditative posture such as Vajrasan or Siddhasan or Padmasan and gently rest your awareness on the Swadishtaana Chakra and practice calm breathing while maintaing focus. It helps release your mind and maybe you might find a solution to a situation you are in.