Liberated?

Of late, my blogging has slowed down. I am not finding topics to blog OR is it just that I don’t need this as an outlet anymore. In the past, I used to be vent-up all inside and tried many outlets, include blogging/writing, Yoga. Blogging was the real outlet. I could write about how one can be better given a state. I was is such a state – i.e., wanting to find peace within myself. As long as I didn’t have the peace, I would think about solutions to the problem and preach – write or advise my students in the Yoga class. The past two years have been transformation to me. I have undergone a personal transformation from deep within me. It might be because of all the spirituality related thinking that was going on for the past 30 years. It might be because I just got older and wiser. It might be because I got more mature. But one key reason to the transformation is that I recognized what was holding me. I am saying this not to take credit. Hw it happened may not be so material. That recognition was that I was getting angry/irritated at every turn. I felt wronged if I was denied an opportunity at work; I felt wrong if someone challenged my thinking; I felt wronged if I found incompetence; I felt irritated if my wife came home late from work; I felt angered if someone tried to force an idea onto me. All valid reasons to get irritated or angry. But that anger would have a lasting impact on my peace of mind. It would create such a turmoil inside me that I had to start all over again. It is as though as a lesson I was to learn that to reach peace of mind, I had to disband that very thing totally. It happened so long that I couldn’t have failed to notice it – God’s way of teaching me a lesson. As long as anger existed in my system, I didn’t realize that I couldn’t seek peace of mind. Once I recognized that, the transformation wasn’t immediate. It has taken over a year or two. Because, bad habits don’t die hard. But, you can recognize the positive impact on life and once you can relate the cause to the change, you will be more bent on following the path.

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