Last November my mother passed away and it was so hard to accept that she isn’t there anymore..her ever smiling face would fade in front of me every moment and her voice would never leave my mind. It was depressing and I felt my life could go over to a deep depression. At some point I realized I have to move on and made attempts to involve in daily life. This helped to a certain extent., but I wasn’t convinced about my acceptance. One day it occurred to me that there will be no answer to my questions why is it like this – that is why should such a beautiful life end? Isn’t it cruel on part of God to take life away like that? My anger started to turn towards Him.
“That was the thing. You never got used to it, the idea of someone being gone. Just when you think it’s reconciled, accepted, someone points it out to you, and it just hits you all over again, that shocking.”
― Sarah Dessen,
I also realized the only way I can somewhat reconcile is to continue what she was doing and looking back I do have a lot of her qualities but haven’t yet realized all of them. This continuity is what has given me peace with the fact. As a friend of mine mentioned ‘The Dead don’t die…’, that is true – they live in us; we have to recognize that and carry them with us though they aren’t physically with us. The reason I brought this topic up is that hopefully it will help those who haven’t dealt with such a loss will know that mere acceptance that one is not here isn’t going to help…